Now she has to stop being gay

Rosie O'Donnell will be taking over for Meredith Vieira on "The View." So much for the outspoken Rosie that has earned praise from Howard Stern in recent months. It will be back to pretending she loves Tom Cruise and the other crap that makes her palatable to the middle of the country.

Professors rock too

A new documentary takes an academic look at headbanging. The film seeks to explain what critics hate the stuff, but millions of fans just want to rock.

Late to the game

Despite creating the environment that caused high gas prices, the idiots in Washington are now striving to come up with a way to bring them down a few pennies. Once they do this, they will spend an inordinate amount of time congratulating themselves before leaving in taxpayer funded government cars.

Scientologists apparently don't play games

Tom Cruise has stopped game companies from making a title based on the upcoming Mission: Impossible III. I guess that makes Katie Holmes' Silent Birth Adventure an unlikely release for XBOX 360.

INXS, in excess

Johnny Depp may star as Michael Hutchence in a movie about the rock star who either killed himself or died in a sex mishap.

The best thing to happen to us since Maxim

We'll be on the Bower Show on Sirius' Maxim radio, Wednesday, May 3 at 3 p.m. They'll be giving away books, so if you're too cheap to buy one, tune in.

Upcoming radio appearances

Wednesday, April 26 (4 p.m.)
THE MICKEY AND AMELIA SHOW, WIYY, Baltimore, MD

Thursday, April 27 (11:05 a.m.)
EILEEN BYRNE, WLS-AM, Chicago, IL

Monday, May 1
MARK MAYNE, WICH, Norwich, CT (8:40 a.m.)
ANN & JOHN, WYJZ, Indianapolis, IN (9:15)

Book released today

Be one of the first on your block to own the blockbuster "50 Things Every Guy Should Know How To Do." Better yet, buy a dozen and give them to everyone you know.

Catch Dan on the Jay Thomas Show

If you have Sirius, you can listen to Dan at 4:30 on the Jay Thomas Show. This is actually the first radio appearance in support of the book, but it should be one of the biggest as this is one of Sirius' signature programs and one of Dan's favorites.